|A Lost Woman|
|A woman in a hot-air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered her altitude and spotted a man in a boat below. She shouted to him, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am."
The man consulted his portable GPS and replied, "You're in a hot air balloon, approximately 30 feet above a ground elevation of 2,346 feet above sea level. You are at 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude.
"She rolled her eyes and said, "You must be a conservative Republican."
"I am," replied the man. "How did you know?"
"Well," answered the balloonist, "I believe everything you told me is the truth because it is technically accurate. But I have no idea what to do with all your factual information, and I'm still lost up here.. Frankly, you're useless because you've not been any help to me at all."
The man smiled and responded, "You must be an Obama Democrat."
"I am," replied the balloonist. "How did you know?"
"Well," said the man, "you have no idea about where you are or where you are going.. You've risen to where you are, due to blowing massive quantities of hot air. You make promises you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problems for you. You're in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but somehow, now it's all my fault!"